Archive for the 'Uncategorized' Category
In Search Of Common Law And Common Sense

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Not Always Right | Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes

(Law Firm | Phoenix, AZ, USA)

Me: “This is [law firm], how can I help you?”

Customer: “Are you located on the fifth floor?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Well, I am on the fifth floor and there are no offices here.”

Me: “There are three law firms on the fifth floor, ma’am. We are the one all the way to the right of the elevator.”

Customer: “No, there are no offices on this floor. It’s totally open. And, its hot.”

Me: “Hot?”

Customer: “Yeah, its hot. I think you gave me the wrong address.”

(Verifies address, customer has the correct address.)

Customer: “Well, its just an open floor. I got out of my car up here and there’s no office.”

Me: “Are you… are you on the fifth floor of the parking garage?”

(My office window looks out at the roof (fifth) level of the parking garage. Sure enough there is a women on her cell phone pacing around the roof level of the parking garage.)

Customer: “You told me to go to the fifth floor.”

Me: “Of the office building, ma’am, not of the parking garage.”

Too Ham Fisted To Realize

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Not Always Right | Funny & Stupid Customer Quotes

(Grocery Store | Minneapolis, MN, USA)

Me: “Hello, ma’am. What can I get for you today?”

Customer: “Do you have any kosher ham here?”

Me: “No, I don’t think there is such a thing.”

Customer: “Darn it! I’ve been to three stores today, and none of them had it either. My husband’s parents are in town, and they’re Jewish. I wanted to make them dinner.”

Me: “I don’t think Jews are allowed to eat pig.”

Customer: “Duh, that’s why I need to get it kosher, so they can eat it.”

Me: “Ma’am, I don’t think they make any kosher ham.”

Customer: “What about pork?”

Google Buzz Trick

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL DOGHOUSE

Google Buzz Trick

Try this at home…  And we wanna see it.  Post a screenshot of the results here.  Immediately!

Digg del.icio.us Facebook Google Bookmarks StumbleUpon Reddit

You’re Always At Most 107 Miles From A McDonald’s [Infographics]

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Consumerist

Stephen Von Worley has figured out that while located in these United States of America, one is always within 107 miles of a McDonald's.

He also created this nifty map to illustrate the concept. According to Mr. Von Worley, "Between the tiny Dakotan hamlets of Meadow and Glad Valley lies the McFarthest Spot: 107 miles distant from the nearest McDonald's, as the crow flies, and 145 miles by car!"

That's quite a drive.

Where The Buffalo Roamed [Weather Sealed via Buzzfeed]

Math Proves It: Grocery Store Express Lane Not So Express [Grocery Stores]

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Consumerist

Here's a different sort of grocery store math than you're probably used to. A high school math teacher in Santa Cruz, California drew up a lesson plan for teaching students to answer the question: "which checkout line is the fastest?" Clearly, this is education after our own hearts. You may have your own anecdata on this subject, and even try to make predictions as you choose your line and thus your destiny, but that is no match for science.

The conclusions, after studying the lines in his local store as well as cash register data: it's people that slow down the checkout process, not items, and the express line is slower when all other things are equal.

The express lane isn't faster. The manager backed me up on this one. You attract more people holding fewer total items, but as the data shows above, when you add one person to the line, you're adding 48 extra seconds to the line length (that's "tender time" added to "other time") without even considering the items in her cart. Meanwhile, an extra item only costs you an extra 2.8 seconds. Therefore, you'd rather add 17 more items to the line than one extra person! I can't believe I'm dropping exclamation points in an essay on grocery shopping but that's how this stuff makes me feel.

We know the feeling!

What I Would Do With This: Groceries [dy/dan] (via Economix)

(Photo: gin_e)

Locke and Demosthenes

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL XKCD

Dear Peter Wiggin: This letter is to inform you that you have received enough upvotes on your reddit comments to become president of the world. Please be at the UN tomorrow at 8:00 sharp.
Dear Peter Wiggin: This letter is to inform you that you have received enough upvotes on your reddit comments to become president of the world. Please be at the UN tomorrow at 8:00 sharp.
strip for September / 04 / 2009

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Sheldon Comic Strip: The daily webcomic by Dave Kellett

strip for September / 04 / 2009

Jump to a Random Strip in the Archives! | Get Sheldon Books 'n Shirts | Buy This Original ArtForum Chat | Archives | E-mail Dave

Best Buy Pie-In-The-Face Promotion Results In Mayhem [Shenanigans]

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Consumerist

Shared by AdamSane
Looks like they thought they were a Buy More, not a Best Buy....

Can I apply to work on the nerd herd?

It all started out as a good-natured, if ill-advised Best Buy promotion to encourage employees to entice customers into signing up for store credit cards. But it ended up in a fracas of verbal and physical assaults. Allow Best Buy employee "X" to tell a tale of mayhem at what was supposed to be a pleasant evening at Best Buy.

On the night of the 30th, the entire store had a meeting to attend from 7:30-9:30. A few months ago, we had started a store wide contest that stated that any employee who got the most BBY Credit Card applications got to throw a pie at the manager of their choice. This contest ended on the night of the meeting, and the winners were given pies to throw at the manager of their choosing. It is important to note that all of the managers were aware and consented to this contest.

You probably have guessed that this did not go very well.

One of the managers, [Manager 1], came to the meeting late and dressed in what only can be defined as "Thug Clothing". Seeing as she has always lectured and disciplined employees on being in on time and dress code, she was an obvious target for the pie contest.

One employee, whom I will call [Employee 1] won in his department and was given a pie. Immediately, [Manager 1] exclaimed "If ANYONE throws a pie at me, I'm gonna KICK THEIR ASS!". We later found out that she was not joking, as many thought she was at the time.

So, in order to reduce a mess, we all head out to the front of the store. The store was currently closed and it was around 9:10 p.m. It is important to note that all of these people were punched in and working on the clock when this happened. About 40 or so witnessed it.

[Employee 1] walks up to [Manager 1] to throw the pie, she loses it and slaps it out of his hand. Ironically enough, this causes pie to spill all over her. So, naturally, she decides to chase [Employee 1] in the store yelling [expletive that means "your father"]! Pie debris is spilled everywhere at the front entrance.

The contest continues outside and [Employee 1] joins the rest of the crowd to watch other managers get pied. [Manager 1] shows up behind [Employee 1] and threatens to kick his ass yet again and begins to cuss him out. Another employee walks up behind to talk to [Manager 1]. Being the crazy bitch that she clearly is, [Manager 1] thinks this other employee [Employee 2] is trying to throw a pie too. So, she turns around and begins to cuss him out and threaten to hurt him, even though the guy did absolutely nothing.

In an act of sheer stupidity, a supervisor named [Manager 2] jumps out and says "I got your back, [Manager 1]" and begins throwing sprite bottles at random people. You know, to add onto the stupidity, I suppose. Two cashiers get hit with the sprite bottles (and the sprite)! [Manager 2] begins picking fights with other people and ends up calling one employee a [very rude slur.]

Did I mention? This entire time, the General Manager is nowhere to be seen. He didn't even come to his own meeting.

About 13 employees have gone to BestBuy HR about this. While the investigation is "pending" many of us fear the GM will give both of these people a slap on the wrist and continue with business as usual. This is because the GM is very close with these people. We feel that if Consumerist made people aware of this, perhaps HR will act differently in the situation and might actually solve this problem.

Why do BestBuy employees seem to be featured on Consumerist so often? Maybe it's because of this. Look who we have to work under. You may have a bad experience with a manager and never shop at the store again. Given this economy, many of us have no choice but to listen and witness this bullsh*t daily. These are both examples of people who clearly should never have worked in retail, but somehow actually got authority of some kind. I would work elsewhere, but I currently have no choice.

X's story sheds some light on just how badly Best Buy management wants to sign you up for their credit cards, as well as how little oversight there seems to be — there's no chance the pie-in-the-face thing was corporate policy. Or is there? We e-mailed Best Buy CEO corporate:

We received word that managers were offering the chance for employees to hit one of them in the face with a pie if they got the most customers to sign up for a credit card. Can you comment on whether this was corporate policy, and assuming it's not, also say what is being done to stop this from happening again?

And got this cryptic reply from Susan Busch, senior director of public relations:

Having fun while being the best is one of Best Buy's core values. Our employees are both encouraged and empowered to make sure fun is infused into all aspects of our work.

Corporate-endorsed pie and soda bottle fights that spice up what would have otherwise been a dull sit-down meeting? Is it just me, or does that particular Best Buy seem like a fun place to work? Well, if it weren't for the violence, profanity and hateful slurs, anyway.

(Photo: Morton Fox)

Comic for September 3, 2009

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Dilbert Daily Strip

Comic for August 30, 2009

Google Reader Shared Post - Source URL Dilbert Daily Strip